Sorry I've been MIA for a while. We've been super busy with work, family and just life in general. You may have noticed that the blog is different! I officially renamed it to Adventures in Anxiety and just want to focus on my mental health journey and mental health in general. I was a guest blogger for the Mr & Mrs blog and in case you missed that you can read it here. I have also created an Instagram for my blog! I decided I want to keep my personal Instagram and this blog separate. There isn't really anything on it right now but I plan to post all blog updates there as well as quotes throughout the week and you can find that here. Make sure you follow my Instagram in order to get updates and some motivational quotes here and there. You can also follow my personal Instagram if you don't already and you can find that here.
Now, on to today's subject. Panic attacks.
Yikes.
I chose this subject for today because as I said before we have been super busy. This started causing some major stress and I had to deal with a few of my anxiety triggers (we'll talk about triggers in another post) all in the span of a couple days and some even at the same time. I knew that all these things were coming up and when you have anxiety, you tend to mentally try to prepare the best you can to deal with these certain situations, or triggers. I had been gearing up for all this stuff for about a month. I imagined everything that could possibly go wrong and tried to plan for every scenario possible. Before anything even happened I managed to make myself physically sick from all the stress and anxiety. I am still trying to get my body back to normal and it's been a couple weeks.
I only had one more thing to do then I could relax so I thought "okay, get through this and I am home free." I guess I let my guard down or something because we were literally driving to this last thing and I had a panic attack right in the car. If you have never had a panic attack before let me try to describe it for you. I realize everyone has different reactions to things and not everyone feels exactly like this when they have a panic attack. First, I get physically sick. Think stomach ache and nausea sick. I was already sick from all the stress so just imagine already feeling sick then it suddenly gets worse. Then comes the bodily reaction of either fight, flight, or freeze. I am a flight so all the blood rushes to my legs, preparing me to run which makes me very cold as well as hot at the same time. In addition to this, my face drains of all color. My heart rate is high and I am trying to keep from hyperventilating but failing. There is definitely a sense of impending doom that some people describe. It seriously feels like your heart is going to burst out of your chest. You are going to die and there is nothing you can do about it. Then the icing on the cake is I start crying which makes having a hard time breathing even harder. Unfortunately for me, I have to just wait for it to pass. After is passes I am absolutely exhausted. I seriously just want to take a nap.
So why do I tell you this? To normalize it. Anxiety is the most commonly diagnosed mental illness so odds are, someone you know probably has it and yet people are still so embarrassed to have it. I can definitely empathize with that embarrassment. I have never felt more weak and useless than when I am having a panic attack or anxiety attack. It's like being a prisoner in your own mind and body.
How can you help when a loved one is having a panic attack?
Well, first and foremost and (hopefully) the most obvious, do NOT tell them to calm down. This is ZERO helpful. Don't you think that if this worked they would have done it already?
Be a reassuring voice. Just let the person know you are there and you guys will get through it together. Then, offer a relaxing activity that they like for after the panic is gone.
Some people don't like to be touched during a panic attack but I do. It grounds me in a way. If Dominic is there he will rub my back or play with my hair and this helps me come down a little easier. If you feel like touching them might help but aren't sure, ask first otherwise you may create a feeling of claustrophobia and that will make it worse.
Remember, they are going to be tired after. They probably will not want to go out or see people. Be understanding about this and give them time to recharge.
A lot of people suffer from panic and anxiety attacks in silence because they are afraid to reach out. If you are one of those people, I challenge you to reach out to just one person you trust about your illness. You might be surprised how helpful and understanding people can be. I can tell you from personal experience, it is easier to fight with someone rather than alone.